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the alteration of time August 2, 2007

Posted by Deera Chat Family in culture, kuwait, Podcast.
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Our cultures are changing … The unacceptable back in the old days is now being acceptable … if you take a look at the “seerat il 700b” show which people back in the old days were considering a NO NO subject to talk about … so what happened now and how people are receiving this kind of change. listen to our show this week to find out.

فوزية الدريع سيرة الب deera chat

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1. عبدالعزيز الحداد - August 2, 2007

مو بس أول توسته . حتى أول شنطة على سير العفش في المطار مو مالت أحد. ليش؟
موضوع الدريع: 1) لا كل ما يعرف يقال. 2) المواضيع الرخيصة أكثر شهرة وانتشار 3) هناك محطات للعائلة ومحطات لغير العوائل أو المشاهدة الجماعية.
لكن خلط الحابل بالنابل لا تعني أكثر من فوضى . تباين البرامج يتناسب مع تباين مستوى الأسر، مثل الدواوين كل دوانية لها مستوى. لامانع من طرح مواضيع مثل مواضيع الدريع في قنوات مشَفرة وليس بالقنوات العامة
التلفزيون المجاني يدخل البيوت بلا إستئذان فيا غريب كن أديب. واللي ما يعرف شي يقول ويسوي أي شي. وأخيراً سبعةٌ مدمّرة: ثروة بلا عمل ، سياسة بلا مباديء ، تجارة بلا أخلاق، متعة بلا ضمير،
معرفة بلا قِيَم، عِلْم بلا إنسانية، و عبادة بلا تضحية. (غاندي)

عبدالعزيز الحداد

2. مها - August 3, 2007

أولا — ملاحظة التوستة الاولى عجيبة — أنا كل ما أكل توست افكر فيها وليش امسوينها ! وهذي تنطبق على كل شي موجود بالرف لما اتسوق __ انا ما اشتري اي قطعة موجودة بأول الرف.
بالنسبة لفوزية الدريع – اهيا انسانة مثقفة و متعلمة وعندما تتكلم بالمواضيع تناقشها بعقلانية و اسلوب علمي و انا احترمها — لانها ما تبحث عن الاثارة بالعكس فهي تبحث عن التثقيف الجنسي لصالح المجتمع.
و بالنسبة للتقسيمات الثلاثة .. انا مع الجروب 4
و يعطيكم العافية

3. مها - August 3, 2007

i forget to say that i thought that u will talk about 2 aug , 1990 !
we should not forget this day !!

4. BeDoOr - August 3, 2007

helloooooo Mi familia :**
miss ya wayed wayed ..

first of all , the first part of the laof .. mmm i personaly eat it when the loaf its self is done and only the first and the last parts are there :PpP other than that i skip it and go to the scond one … after listening to this episode i dont have a good reason for that … poor tost 😦 from now on i’ll eat it ok ? its a tost after all … bat has no face ? ;/

about the episode .. the other day i was talking to my friend about this issue ..
Kuwait is an islamic country .. everyone including other nationalities living in kuwait they must respect that … yesterday i was having this dump moment when i agreed to go to the movies in marina mall with a friend . the noise was driving me crazy i even looked at some teens and told them if they’re done watching the door is wide open and they were looking at me as if im the one who’e not cool and being silent . الشرهة على الامن اللي حاطينة يشوف الفلم و مو قادر على شوية يهال

el mohim , in marina there was this “TABOO” dressing by everyone .. men / women … in the old days a man wont go to someplace in shorts looks like an underwear .. and the women wont go out of her room ( house ) wearing something unwearingable .. especially if she’s fat and she cant see it .
يسببون تلوث بصري صح ؟

“sex” must considered to be taboo .. but for now its getting normal every day .. ayam awal .. this topic must be discussed between husbands and wifes only .. but now .. you’ll find the whole family watching it :S strange ;/
but to be positive … well i think she’s ( Dr.drai3 ) helping in a way to give information that we didnt study in schools and for sure parents keeps it taboo till its time for the man or woman to get married .. and this makes it worse :S

i agree on what you said Mesaed about the types of ppl in the society .. about the open type of ppl ..
actually , i agree .. cuz i think its according to the person .. if he’s ok and normal and has a big head .. then he wont be affected by something .. he;ll be only watching and getting information according to what he/she needs .. its like ena kel shay ekon crystal clear and there to the ppl .. but we must not forget that we’re an islamic country and must be in between ..
to be an open minded person is to be flexible not to be talking about taboo in public and then say we’re open minded ( ero7 emot a7san ) :@

ana im in the شريحة مساعد بروحه 😛

thaanks alot guys ..
Loved it and nice topic as always .
take care and have a nice summer 🙂

p.s : about what مها said ..
2nd/ aug ?
we mustnt forget .

5. Dana - August 3, 2007

Hello guys,

Regarding the topic, i think that we should teach the parents how to discuss the tabooed stuff with there kids coz when these things come out from ur parents in a proper way u will believe it plus u will be apple to discuss it even. But when it comes from TV u will just take it as it is and, of course, not everything said is true. What is happening now is that these shows are teaching kids how to do these tabooed stuff not teaching them about it. This is what i think.

With best wishes and best regards, DANA 🙂

6. Deera Chat Family - August 5, 2007

Abdul Aziz Al Haddad
Thank you Mr. Al Haddad and it is an Honor to have you as listener to Deera Chat. and yeah whats up with the first bags in the airport!!! Also i have to say one on the reasons why things are getting out of hand is the amount of information flowing, you have tones of TV channels, tones of radio stations, and the internet!! so this kind of openess should be expected and we as a community have to teach ourselves how to manage

thanks again for your valuable input and looking forward to hear from you again.

Maha
welcome on board Maha and we have to agree that Ms. Al Dri3 is a very well educated person and there is no doubt about that but our question was the stuff she talks about were tabooed back in the old days and now it is fine? thats it, we actually addressing a phenomena

and yeah good point about the 2nd of August…. i guess it slipped off our minds
and yes it is a very important matter and we always have to look back at our history to know where we come from and the same thing applies to our topic

Bedoor
don’t you like this loaf crispy dripping butter oil??? if u didn’t try it then you should …. and about the movie … seems like u went to Arabic picture there …and yeah Marina is a bad choice if u want to watch a movie … go to Ajial … NO ONE GOES there
and yeah at the end it comes to the person himself…. if u agree on what u hear or what u see … u take it or leave it …. as simple as that … so yeah u r absolutely right

Dana …
i think being “apple” to discuss the issues properly with parents is an essential matter in creating a well oriented generation in the future …. so back again to the first comment to MR. Al haddad that time now is different due to the flow of information that is not comparable to what people used to hear or see back in the old days.

Welcome on Board

7. Shaima - August 5, 2007

Hiii guys … it’s very nice subject bs i wana say .. taboo things that what human likes always or usually .. for me, about “serat EL 7obb” with all respect to Dectora i can’t watch it coz it disappoint me :s coz it has lots of problems AND sometime things that children don’t have to listen to although -ma yga9roon they mention above 18- but not in Kuwait although am suffering from Kuwait society mentality but still we have to respect where we live. bs el mushkela 3ndena they want everything to be NOT TABOO 3ala bona open mind !!!! they don’t respect others freedom.

8. Deera Chat Family - August 5, 2007

Shaima
welcome on board and hope to read from you more often
thanks for being interested in the subject and we have to say the comments above show the different aspects and the different point of views people have regarding our subject … and again as we mentioned that we all live in our place and we all have to respect each other in a way that none loses his respect to others …. actually i have to agree on preventing such early knowledge to our children and in our case here with Dr. Al Dari3 … i believe it is the parents responsibility to allow their kids to watch or not to watch and that is one way of apply your rules to your life …. we r not agreeing or disagreeing with what is being broad casted on tv … but at the end it is u who decides what to hear and what to watch …

9. BeDoOr - August 5, 2007

next time you go to Ajial .. take me k ?
cuz i dont go to far places alone 😛 and yeah im a perfect partner for a cinema .. trust me a9er 3agel :PpP

i didnt get you in “seems like u went to Arabic picture there …” if you meant an Arabic Movie .. then NO i dont like arabic movies .. went to little children

P.s : i liked the actor Abdulaziz alhaddad ..do u know him ? is the first commenter the actor ?

thanks alot and waiting for next episode

10. Deera Chat Family - August 6, 2007

yeah i meant a movie …. and yeah the first commenter is the Actor … COOL HUH

11. BeDoOr - August 7, 2007

yeaaaaah … cool 😉
honestly i dont remember arabic/gulf actors always but i remember Abdul3aziz cuz i actually watched one of his works named : أطفال الغد
and never missed it when its was there in tv 😉
it was mainly a family program and so informative and in arabic Language 😀

i was younger though… school days ..

so yeah see i remember things/ppl who’s good 😉

all best for all .
good night .

12. BeDoOr - August 7, 2007

by never missed it i mean i never missed an episode of it .

13. Raja - August 7, 2007

Thanks for the interesting topic. I agree that there are three types of people in the toboo thing. But hte problem is that I believe that -talking about the first group of people, those who refer to religion in everything- it’s really good to connect the regulations of Islam in everything and know what is taboo to avoid. The problem is that a lot of this group talk and talk and urgue others to keep away from the taboo thing and in other situations they do all the taboos. Not all of them do that of course but seriously I’ve become really afraid of this group of people as alot are the first to do what they say is taboo. I believe moderate people are better. Taboo topics must be discussed but surely in the right place with the right people in the right situations. It’s good to discuss taboo topics as people will get the reason why these things are taboo. Hope I didn’t anyting that bothers anyone here and by the way I love the first piece of the toast loaf 🙂

14. Nora-Cassandra - August 7, 2007

I never leave the first piece of the bread or the toast! That is my favorite part and you‘ll see me eating it before anyone else would (as my daughter likes it too)…

I think life has to change! I can’t really comment on this subject as I never believed in the taboos you had in Kuwait! I spoke about things I wasn’t allowed to talk about it over 15 years ago when living in Kuwait! Again I have never been a Muslim so I can’t be commenting on the religious side!

Good subject and well spoken about! You’ll never find a community that all will have the same way of thinking! I always have been over liberated and that was painful for my Kuwaiti family! So in the end some one will not be happy!

15. The Lady - August 9, 2007

Kuwait, like any other country in the world, is a melting pot. We have different cultures, social standards and differences. So there is no such thing as a typical Kuwaiti Taboo. Msa3id ow 3ali, you deconstructed the taboo when you talked about taboo it in deera chat. Not a lot of people have the courage to point out how our society thinks and regardless of the topic….what we are saying now, our responses….etc is taboo.

I have to say that us having divided thoughts and ideas is a sign of culture. People only advance when they have differences and issues to talk about. There has to be a day when we have to get out of the box and talk about situations that are harming our individuals and society. Many people in Kuwait, regardless of the gender, suffer from problems that could not be told because of taboo….their secrets are buried with them but it affects others around them. Sometimes, a tv show is not enough, an article is not suitable, and a friend is just not the right embracer. What we need in Kuwait are places where people could listen, help and suggest solutions with top client privacy. What is told in the Jareema, or at Dr, Drai3’s program is nothing but surface problems that have deeper meanings not to mention such media serve only the mass media production not the people.

Keep it coming guys…

16. Erzulie - August 9, 2007

Like the others, I do think this is an interesting and rather important topic that you could have covered more on. I honestly think that comparing Kuwait’s present social state to the “Good ol’ Days” is too far-fetched. We are living in a different and extremely globalized world bombarded with media from all corners of the earth.
I do not have time to watch television but if I do, I usually tune into Dr. Fozia Al-Drai3’s program. I am actually thankful that someone is willing shed light upon the accumulating problems in society whether it is between a married couple or an unwed mother-to-be. A few might turn a blind on such issues – possibly because they do not relate to their personal life or the topic is too depressing – but I think that we should know about this and ask ourselves why these things happen; people learn from their mistakes and I think that we should learn from others’ as well.
And the three categories you mentioned are not so black and white. First of all, I think that everyone should keep religion in mind because in the end, el Islam akhlaq. Regarding the “liberal” classification, I think that living openly is different than having an open mind. When someone is open minded, they are receptive and accept all sorts of information. It is up to their character and upbringing to filter what they can use and embrace and let the other factors drain away.
One trend that even my expatriate co-workers noticed is the gay trend, and I am not sure if I can call one’s sexual orientation as a “trend” but seeing as how many flaunt it rather unnecessarily in a way that puts “Gay Pride” parades to shame, well, I think I can get away with it for now. Apart from the “I’m gay & proud attitude,” you also have the handful of girls who have their fashionable “gay friend” a la *fill in the blank with a gay-friendly series.*
When I see such things, I do not cuss them out or shake my head at them. I simply ask “Why?” And not “Why are these people gay?” but “Why are they so vocal about it considering they are living in a conservative country?” There are a lot of gays and lesbians here in Kuwait, some actually married to each other (a gay man and a lesbian) in an agreement to have relationships with people of the same gender. But that is all done in private i.e. the general public does not know about the what’s and how’s of such situations.
Times are changing and I think that parents and guardians should gradually inform their children (when they reach the appropriate age) about such things because you do not want anyone to be shocked when they discover such private issues about others or, God forbid, have them go through a traumatic and life-changing – in a negative sense – experience due to their naïveté.

PS Please excuse my long comment that might have strayed off the topic at hand.

17. The Lady - August 10, 2007

Erzulie…what you said is so true. As you said we are a part of the global village so don’t be surprised when seeing and experiencing the Gay phenomenon. It was always there but under the tables…taboo. Asking why will not lead you anywhere because this issue is far more complicated. Some experienced abuse, some have biological problems, some have psychological tendencies, and others just want to be gay. This goes for the rest of the globe. There are no set of rules for being gay. I don’t think sexuality is a major problem, the problem is with people and handling social responsibilities and ignoring them because they are taboo. If revealing taboo helps to solve the problem…then let it be. But if revealing taboo in the sake of just talking about it and seeing the negative rather than the positive, then I think keeping it taboo is a more adequate solution.

18. Deera Chat Family - August 10, 2007

Raja
Welcome on board Raja and happy to have with us
as for your comment … yes you are right and that again shows how society works with its mix of thoughts and backgrounds where you agree on things and disagree on other and you are the one who must select what you will be and what to expose yourself to

Nora
its been a while since we last heard from you
GOOD GIRL, you should never leave it and word of advice it taste sooooo good if you toast it and have peanut butter on it … man it tastes soooo good,
as for your comment i believe if we were all the same … it would’ve been boring and lame the whole time …

The lady
welcome on board and wish you all the best in FSU 😉
i totally agree … being different in kuwait is WRONG to alot of people … doesn’t matter how you define this difference and alot of people who are different just don’t expose it to others coz they’ll be hated by society … and i totally agree about having qualified people to discuss any kind issues people have regardless of their background …
thanks again for the comment

will comment on the rest when i come back
Ali

19. Erzulie - August 11, 2007

If you don’t mind gentlemen, I’d like to reply to The Lady’s comment…

What you said about the “gay issue” is right and yes, it is a gray area. What’s coming up next is mostly from college classes, articles and one book – specifically “Raising Boys” by Steven Biddulph; in other words, I’m no expert on the matter. Many people are gay due to childhood experiences. A boy who does not have a father or father figure in his life while growing up may end up being gay because of an unfulfilled need/desire for love from another man i.e. the absent father, and the same goes for girls as well. Speaking of upbringing, parents should be THE idol in their childrens’ lives, because in some cases, if a mother mistreats/abuses her son, he will grow up to hate women and again, the same goes with a girl’s relationship with her father. Others become gay/lesbians because of molestation/sexual assault. You mentioned biological factors as another reason and I assume that that could be fixed with therapy and horomone treatment. Personally, I do not buy the “I am born with it” claim. Another factor that relates to our country is spoiling children silly i.e. excess “dala3.” But in our society, the lack of a normal, decent and rather human platonic interactions between males and females has also led to the explosion of gays and lesbians, especially in my generation and the one after (think 23 and under). Such relationships – where a lot are sexual – start from the growth of mental and emotional repression. Males and females are becoming foreign objects in this dehumanizing system of life.

As I have stated before, gays and lesbians have always been part of society, more or less. However now, there is something rather absurd about it. One might quip in and say “But gays and lesbians are abnormalities to begin with!” I am going to shrug away such comments because I do not think they are relevant to Kuwait’s particular situation. If one is mature and gay/lesbian, he/she knows that being out and proud about his/her sexual orientation would not be acceptable nor a practical thing to do in our society and in every other conservative place in the world.

Back to the absurd factor. I was actually talking to my older brother about this particular issue the other day. He said that his friend’s mother (yes that’s quite a stretch but hang on) is a public figure. She was invited to speak about morals and values at a public girl’s high school here in Kuwait. Before she entered the hall, the school’s principal whispered in her ear, “Tara fee boyat hnee.” The woman raised a perplexed eyebrow before taking her place behind the podium. As she was speaking, her eyes flitted away from the two girls wearing baggy shorts and a shirt with their hair cut short to the two rather pretty young women sitting side by side. However, the two pretty girls were sprawled in a relaxed manner on their seats; one of the girls was nuzzling the other girl’s neck. “Intaw! Gi3daw 3adil!” the principal shouted at them and ordered them to sit properly. “Bes 6areeqat’hom oo ga3dat’hom kanat istifzazeya…” my brother said and THAT is precisely what I find odd and quite unnecessary. The question that runs in my head is “What are you trying to prove with this rather hedonistic social disregard that will probably if not surely backfire on you?” Two of my colleagues in college are lesbians and not once did they behave the same way as the girls (and guys) do here.

And I wanted to add a little detail to Dr. Fozia Al-Drai3’s program. It is true that discretion is embraced in our part of the world, especially concerning family/intimate matters. Personally, I see her program as a sign that something is seriously wrong with our society seeing as how we are not a confessional culture like the US.

PS Again, sorry for the long comment. Thanks.

20. NoNoWa - August 12, 2007

YES!! It’s so right to say that we have to live with each others differences!! Thats so true!! But also RESPECT each other…..

The discussion of “the taboos” has to be done—but at a proper time and age, depending on the exact subject. It can sometimes be hard to talk to your children about these kinds of things, but better from a parent than from someone at school that cud be filling their heads with false info.

Here there are so many “tabooed” things- sexual preferences, family matters, sex, drug use, alcohol…….the point is that if these kinds of things were brought out into the open and discussed- people wud have a better understanding of whats really going on and maybe make better choices in their life. Since when does being so hush-hush about something ever help?????

I agree also with what you guys were saying about going back to our religions or “finding God” again. But it seems so unfortunate that, it is failing among our society. Young and old alike are drifting away from religion minute by minute….such a shame…cuz that in itself wud help to solve some of these issues …

Great Job guys- I understood what I cud of your cast cuz i am not completely fluent in Arabic, but I will be soon enuf 🙂 So- sorry if I drifted off subject or sumthin 🙂

21. Noor - August 15, 2007

i really enjoy your episode your just amazing musaed 🙂

22. Abdullah - August 20, 2007

good stuff!
a7la shay “dektooreyya” ;P


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